Are you too intense?

From the desk of Kelsey Buell,

I remember my senior year in high school, I participated in a small choir. 

I was a co-lead of the group, and when the concert night arrived, I was so excited for our performance.

We had learned a really challenging song and practiced very hard.

It was going to be PERFECT.

To flush out any last-minute challenges in the song, I went to round up the group to practice it one more time.

I found them in the choir room, laughing and joking around. Finding it difficult to get their attention, and feeling the importance of one last practice, I found myself feeling extremely frustrated.

Why would they be laughing and joking around, when we were about to give a very important performance?

Finally, I snapped, “Why won’t any of you take this seriously?!” I shouted.

They all looked at me, wide eyed and shocked.

We practiced and it was a great performance, but to this day it’s hard to forgive myself for yelling at the group.

Their lighthearted energy could have been the positive fuel needed to have a great performance, without needing one last serious rehearsal.

Moving on…

The fact that I remember this occurrence and am still ashamed of my actions, means I was responding to a situation that did not serve me well.

Although I should not have freaked out the way I did, reflecting on this moment taught me some very important lessons.

I know now, that sometimes the best way to prepare and get out the nerves is by having a laugh or engaging in an activity in a fun way.

I pray if you’re feeling a bit uptight someday, that you can reflect on my experience, and decide to take a deep breath and not take the situation as seriously.

Not only will it positively impact those around you, but it’ll definitely help your mental health as well.

Here are some quick tips to not take things too seriously:

  • Monitor your frustrations and ask – is it valid for me to be frustrated? Take a deep breath.
  • Try to see the bright spots in the challenges – usually if you’re feeling uptight, it’s because there is something negative you’re focusing on.
  • Let go of grudges – they are counterproductive and they suppress your joy
  • When you get upset, try to think of something to laugh at – have a funny meme in your back pocket that always makes you laugh when you’re feeling down.

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